Mike Quackenbush, Mister ZERO, UltraMantis, Icarus, & Gran Akuma vs. The Wild Cards (Eddie Kingston & BlackJack Marciano), Conundrum (Jigsaw & Rorschach), & Hallowicked from Aniversario 2003

5.24.2003

Allentown, PA

This match is on the Best of 2003 DVD, which is available for purchase at Smart Mark Video.  For a more informed opinion on this match, check out Kevin Ford’s review.

Recap from TJ Hawke:

There were a lot of shenanigans early on. This feels like a Chikara match that could happen today, and it wouldn’t feel out of place. The rudos were having a lot of problems early on in terms of getting along. The tecnicos were just running through the rudos for the longest time. This match may be a long one. After fifteen plus minutes, the rudos finally got control of the match when Kingston dropped Akuma on his head with a German. They got the heat on Akuma for a while. Akuma eventually escaped and tagged out. The tecnicos ran wild for mere moments before Icarus got cut off with a double team move from The Wildcards. Icarus eventually escaped, and ZERO made a comeback. ZERO hit Kingston with a tope suicida. The tope was definitely in the spirit of Kingston. Everyone did dives to the floor. Back in the ring, they did a ten person submission spot. A few people got to the ropes to break it up. Marciano hit Quack with a reverse powerslam and then a slopping diving attack. The teams traded nearfalls. Jigsaw hit ZERO with Coast-to-Coast. These nearfalls went on for a while. A really long time in fact. The match is going on forty minutes. I’m so numb to everything and no longer care about it at all. Icarus ate a super fisherman buster from Hallowicked and then a wacky diving splash from Jigsaw. Kingston tried to finish Kingston with the Condo Clutch. Quack applied the Lightning Lock to Jigsaw, and Jigsaw tapped out.

That was certainly long. I used to be a lot more conflicted about these types of matches, but now I realize there is nothing gained by “being nice” to them. The match was incredibly long for no justifiable reason. I’m not against extremely long matches as a rule or anything, but there has to be enough substance to justify the length. While I enjoyed the first two thirds of the match (tecnicos running through the rudos, and the  solid enough heat segments), the finishing stretch was so excessive in length that I just no longer cared after a while. In conclusion, this match was a worthy experiment that I will never be watching again.

Match Rating: **1/4

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